Although physically I am in Ohio, back to where I came from, my heart has never left Spain. Im trying to let go so I can move on with my life even if I am here temporarily (who knows) I need to move on...its hard and having a boyfriend in Spain doesnt make it easy. My heart aches more and more everyday without him. He is strong and seems to be doing fine without me but when he shows me his weak side, it truely helps me. I guess because I know he is having as hard of a time without me as I am without him.
I visited a friend tonight, Rasa from Lithuania. She is studying here in The States but from Europe. She told me that wherever you are in the present moment is where you need to make your life, your happiness. It helped me. I need to let go of Spain. I had such a great time there and I dont feel like saying goodbye knowing I will be back. I just need to be able to focus now on what Im doing here, why Im here and to enjoy life here. Things have to get better. They will. My car breaks broke and my dad and I fixed them. I could have spent $400 on them but we did the work, three times as long but it only cost me $30. It was worth it.
ok so what makes me happy?
dancing...salsa...
watching movies and hanging out with friends
studying...feels like Im working towards something
finding a job...this is important...not impossible
Life will get better....patience i need a bit of patience!
